Lethargy: Repose en Paix

To tell the truth, I am an extremely lazy person. It is a part of my personality to be sleeping all day on the couch, watching the "idiot box"(I despise that name, because for me, it is only idiots who find something as wonderfully divine as the television, to be an idiot box) or probably dozing off. When my mum asks me how I can manage to be stationary in one place for so long, I often tell her that it's inertia.

For the uninitiated, or rather, the uneducated, because I am so very sure that every education board in India,(yes, even the Mizoram board of secondary education) has inertia in it's syllabus somewhere around the 6th standard. (If you're reading a blog and you haven't passed standard 6, I'll be mighty amazed), inertia is the ability of a body to maintain it's state of rest or of uniform motion unless an external force acts upon it. I guess I have succinctly explained the term in layman's language.

Digression necessary: Layman, that is one term I fail to understand. I have researched the etymology of the word and I have come to understand that it actually stands for people who do not belong to the clergy. By that definition I guess even Galileo had to be a layman, because there is no way a heretic could be clergy. By the natural dilution and mutation of the word thanks to Chronos, it now reads lay instead of laity. It sounds more like some crazy dude, high on testosterone addicted to getting laid rather than an unscientific, uneducated ox which by the way, both mean the same either ways. So there you go!

Now back to the topic. When I use the word inertia, my mum tends to use the word lethargy. Now that is a big word with many possible meanings. I decided to look up the word and the results I found were quite interesting. Lethargy stands for a state of sluggishness, inactivity or fatigue. An apt way to say, in short, ME. Now when you look up lethargy on wikipedia, it redirects you to fatigue.



Fatigue can be both physical and mental. Physical fatigue is not something I face often, considering that I am a professional Football player and being a winger requires me to be one of the fittest players on the field having to cover up to 10 kms/match. But mental fatigue is something I am extremely familiar with. Having to wake up each day, having to go through another 24 hours as an earthling, it's emotionally draining, if you get my drift.

I also read that chronic fatigue(long lasting fatigue) is a symptom for various conditions. Now that got me thinking. As far as I remember, I have always been lethargic and hence according to wiki at least, I suffer from fatigue. Hence that means I probably have chronic fatigue and that makes me a possible patient of say Anxiety, Cancer, Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Endometriosis, Fibromyalgia, Hemochromatosis and a whole load of other not so interesting diseases. Coming to think of it, wiki also believes that I might be Pregnant, but I think that we may discount that possibility on the basis of the vital information that I am virgin. Oh, and I forgot to mention, I am a descendant of Adam...so that decides it. At least I am not going to conceive.

Wiki further suggests that I may be suffering from Combat stress disorder. Now that is a huge possibility considering the fact that I have to battle my way throughout the day against all odds(viz. society, people, earthlings, people, animals, chores, earthlings) in order to successfully waste as much time as possible from the 24 hrs allocated by God Almighty so kindly. But I think I can safely "rest" with the knowledge that this condition is incurable and I shall have to do only things that I can enjoy while laying back on a couch, and thankfully writing a blog is one of them.

Prison Break

I have always wondered how my mum, with all due respect, can bear to watch these serials which seem to go on and on forever. I was always of the opinion that human interest in a particular subject is limited and change is the only thing which refreshes that interest. Every show needs to stop and a new show needs to come out in it's place to keep the channel trps up.
But now i realise how wrong i was.

Recently on the advise of some friend of mine, i started watching this series called Prison break. It's about how the hierarchy in the U.S federal services actually runs the country using the president as their pawn.(Though a certain George W may disagree). They implicate an innocent man Lincoln Burrows for the murder of the VP's bro. His brother, the hero of this series, a god as far as i am concerned, Michael Scofield, realises that his brother is innocent. Any loving brother in this situation, i am sure, would go to court seeking justice. This is exactly what Scofield does, albeit in a completely different manner.

He studies the inmates of the Fox River state penitentiary, their case histories, their backgrounds and does a complete analysis of the guards. By a stroke of luck and it is here that I sense the flaw, he is a structural engineer, and it was his partner who had the blueprint for the penitentiary. So this dude Scofield gets the entire blueprint scaled to size and tattooed onto his body. He goes and fires a pistol in a bank he has no intention of robbing(because he is quite rich anyways) kinda like a dog running after a cab he has no intention of hiring. But thanks to this little incident, the judge sees it incumbent that he see the inside of a jail cell and sentences him to a year at Fox River. Voila. Stage I successful. Once he gets inside, he has reps on the outside who are working their arses out(figuratively and anyways they keep getting killed one by one by a group of federal agents called the company) just to figure out the undercurrents in this case.

For the first time in my life, I actually empathised with them inmates. Bellick, the jailer is brilliantly despicable and T-Bag as the bad man inmate is awesome. I am so inspired by Scofield that I am actually thinking of having my hair cut exactly like him. I guess that will be difficult since for the past 4 years I have had my hair like Becks trademark unkempt look, but the transition, I guess will be smooth.

Until next time blog!!

P.S: There's this character who appears in the second season called Mahon who is as intelligent as Scofield (after a tablet of Metamphetamine) and guesses exactly what Scofield had planned during and after the breakout. Though I personally don't advocate the use of "Met" for enhancing your alertness, this guy is some dude!!

United pour la vie!

As I lie on my bed, wondering what worse can happen, what further doubts do i have to entertain? How long will this tension last? How do i come out of this?

I can completely forgive you for thinking that these here lines were spoken by some cranky old whore in the dirtiest street in Eastern Europe. But, in fact these were the exact same thoughts that I had as I saw Chelsea win against Newcastle with relative ease and poise.
The premiership is now finely balanced with everything to play for on the very last day.
Here I quote some arbit dude from one of my friends orkut list and he says "Mann.....isn't it amazing that United are playing on Sunday at 7.30 and so are Chelsea, great co-incidence...this is going to be fantastic to watch....switching between channels with the excitement at a max!!!"
All I can say to this is that this dude sure hasn't watched the last day of the Premiership for a long long time. I say this because, for reasons related to the Integrity and Honesty of the league, the F.A always has conducted the fixtures on the last day at the same time. All matches kick off simultaneously on the final day of the season to avoid any match fixing scandals.
This is the breed of fans we're getting nowadays and I guess this will continue for some time to come.
I believe that we should let results speak for themselves. I rest my case till the 22nd of May.
That is when you'll really know how this season shaped out.
Moscow is where all eyes will be on the 21st of May, but come the 11th, all eyes will surely be on the JJB stadium because the title is United's for the taking.

There's only one United.
P.S: I had a very important exam the day after the Barca Vs United fixture and I'd run the risk by staying up to watch the entire match, unlike most of my friends, if i may add. One of my friends asked me after the test whether it was so important to watch the match, and I told her, it was even more important than the test itself. All the United fans will know, it truly is.